Maybe some labels are best left in a closet. Maybe when we label people – bride, groom, husband, wife, married, single – we forget to look past the label to the person.
– Carrie Bradshaw, Sex in the City Movie
Now, I’m normally not a SITC fan. I never really watched the show when it was on and I’ve only watched the very end of the movie. However, today when I heard this line from the movie, it really stood out to me.
Maybe it was because I feel like lately I’ve become more of a label than a person.
No, no one has said anything to me. It is how I perceive myself.
I began to feel this way today while I was sitting in my friend’s dining room with another friend of ours. They are both married. One has 2 kids and the other is pregnant with her first. They began to talk about being pregnant and giving birth. This is a typical conversation that our friend with 2 kids will have with the 2 pregnant women in our church.
I’ll be honest – sometimes it is too much for me. I can only take so much before I want to zone out or just leave… today I didn’t. I stayed and listened.
Because although I label myself they don’t unless someone mentions that I’m not married. Part of what I want to change this year is the labeling of people. Of myself.
Sure I’m single but that shouldn’t mean that I am any less of a person than my married friends.
That’s how the church projects it though. It may not mean to but sometimes I get the feeling that people in my church won’t see me as a complete person until I am married with children. So even if I change the perception within my own church, I will see it as a step forward.
So what if I am 28, unmarried and childless? I still have a ministry that God has called me to. I still have to walk the path He has laid out for me and it can’t start when I get married because what if I don’t? Then I guess my ministry will go to someone else. Someone else will pick up the burden and run with it.
My prayer for everyone is that we don’t live as people think we ought to based on the labels we give ourselves and each other. Let’s love each other more than what do now. Offer each other grace and mercy regardless of the labels. Let’s put the fruits of the Spirit to practice when we are dealing with our brethren. With ourselves.
I know I need to start.
What about you?